012014 Balish Sami ShesSOMEKindOfSlut
conciseTactician CT began trolling arcaneArtisan AA at 02:13 -- 02:14 CT: Erm, Sami, I WISHED to EXPLAIN myself for my... BEHAVIOR last night. 02:14 AA: Huh? What do you mean? 02:14 AA: You were mad at me for meddling in stuff I didn't really get, right? 02:15 CT: MOST trolls would be... GREATFUL for Quadrental ASSISTANCE, in some castes. 02:15 CT: WELL, in MOST castes. 02:15 CT: The ONLY one that SHOULDN'T be meddeled with is the EMPRESS'S royal blood. 02:16 AA: You guys have an Empress? 02:16 CT: HAD. 02:16 AA: Oh. 02:17 AA: I guess some places, humans have emperors and empresses too. 02:17 CT: Maenam WOULD step to the POSITION, but she SEEMS to DISLIKE the THOUGHT. 02:17 AA: Oh, wait....that must be what Maenam meant about her feeling obligated to study! 02:17 CT: We had ONE, a SINGLE lucky grub BLESSED with the Fushcia blood. 02:18 AA: She said she was an HEIRESS, but I thought she just meant of like a corporation or something. 02:19 AA: Wait, so....Maenam's a princess? A real, live princess? 02:19 CT: Sami, I contacted you for a REASON. 02:19 CT: And WAS. 02:19 AA: Oh. I'm sorry. 02:19 CT: She said she WISHES not to be ADRESSED as such. 02:19 AA: That's just a lot to take in. 02:19 CT: Well, OKAY then, YES, she was, but as I SAID, she gave it UP. 02:21 AA: I see. I guess that's why she seemed so approachable. She seemed just like a normal girl....other than being such a hotshot fashion designer, I mean. 02:22 CT: I KNOW, she seemed to be INAPPROPRIATE for the ROLE, something which has been a PROBLEM for a LONG while, on MY mind at LEAST. 02:23 AA: So....you were mad at me for trying to set you up with a "NOT" PRINCESS as your moirail? 02:24 CT: No, NOT that. 02:24 CT: I was MAD at you for INTERFERING at ALL. 02:24 AA: Well yeah I got that part. 02:24 CT: Which is SOMETHING I shouldn't have been KINDER about. 02:25 AA: But it seemed like you were going somewhere with this other than that when you started explaining this case stuff. 02:25 AA: Caste, I mean. 02:26 CT: RIGHT, right, it's only ADDING to the particularity of the SITUATION. 02:27 CT: Myself in PARTICULAR, with the SITUATION with Maenam HERSELF. 02:28 CT: Okay, WELL, I am UNSURE about TELLING you this, to be HONEST. 02:28 CT: But you AT LEAST deserve an EXPLAINATION. 02:28 AA: Huh? Why? 02:28 CT: I wasn't EXACTLY nice, and my SITUATION is a little UNIQUE. 02:29 AA: Yeah, but I get why you weren't nice. Heck, even as angry as you were, you didn't seem half as angry as Libby. 02:29 AA: I've never seen her so mad as when I first broached the subject. 02:29 CT: Uh. 02:30 CT: SHE thought moirails... Were CLOSER than that what they ARE. 02:30 AA: Yeah, but I think that's partially my fault. 02:30 AA: Because I didn't understand it really well and I explained it poorly... 02:30 CT: Probably. 02:30 AA: ...and actually, even explaining it right, I still understand why she would be upset. 02:30 AA: Because Null told Beau she though Beau needed a moirail today, and when Beau told me, I kind of... 02:31 AA: ...I mean I *supported* her, but I guess I felt a little hurt. 02:31 CT: Oh? 02:31 AA: And it must've been way worse for Libby. 02:31 CT: YES, it SEEMS to be. 02:31 CT: She UNDERSTANDS it better now, though. 02:31 CT: I don't KNOW about Beau, thought. 02:31 CT: A NON-TROLL pale relationship is.... STRANGE. 02:31 AA: I'm getting used to the idea. 02:32 CT: Seeing how the LAST one turned OUT. 02:33 CT: HONESTLY, if you love her, let her GO, and trust her. 02:34 AA: Yeah. That's what I'm doing. 02:34 CT: Then don't WORRY. 02:34 CT: Beau's a SMART human. 02:34 AA: I'll try. 02:34 AA: Yeah. The smartest. <3 02:34 CT: She'll KNOW to talk to you if it's IMPORTANT. 02:34 CT: Gross. 02:34 CT: Keep your FLIRTATIONS to yourself. 02:34 AA: I wasn't flirting! 02:35 AA: I was talking about my girlfriend! 02:35 CT: COMPLETE flushed flirtations. Toward HER, I mean. 02:35 AA: Oh. 02:35 AA: Okay, then yeah, I guess that's fair. 02:35 CT: BESIDES. 02:35 CT: Libby is the SMARTEST, hands down. 02:36 AA: Well she's not human. 02:36 AA: But let's not get into a "Who's got the best girlfriend" fight. 02:36 CT: Right. 02:36 CT: Erm. 02:37 AA: But yeah, I guess this whole thing was me saying "It's okay, I get why you were angry." 02:37 CT: No, you REALLY don't. 02:38 AA: I....don't? 02:38 CT: You get why Libby WAS, it SEEMS. 02:38 CT: My anger is DIFFERENT. 02:38 AA: Well no, but you were mad at me for interfering with you and putting Maenam in danger and also she's a princess only not really but I'm probably a peasant or something in your eyes? 02:39 CT: No, that's not it AT ALL. 02:39 AA: It's not? 02:39 CT: Caste doesn't really MATTER anymore, anyways. BESIDES, your text color... 02:39 CT: Ah. 02:39 CT: I'm AVOIDING it. 02:39 CT: INTERESTING. 02:40 AA: What is? 02:40 CT: My AVOIDANCE. 02:40 CT: I may be AFRAID to tell you. 02:40 CT: That's PARTICULAR. 02:40 AA: Really? Why? Do you think I'll be angry? 02:40 AA: Or hurt? 02:40 CT: SCARED. 02:41 AA: You think I'll be scared? 02:41 CT: YES, I do. 02:41 AA: I'm scared ALL THE TIME, Balish. What's one more scary thing added to the pile? 02:42 CT: BECAUSE, it's someone you SEEM to care about, if ONLY in your STRAGE palepromiscuous way. 02:42 AA: Huh? 02:42 AA: Okay, now I *have* to know. 02:42 CT: Are you SCARED of me, Sami? 02:43 AA: I'm more scared FOR you than I am OF you. 02:43 AA: I mean you were a little scary at Troll Christmas, but....I'm more worried about how it's affecting you than I am about what it'll do to me. 02:44 CT: Okay, no more AVOIDING, the LAST time someone was PUSHED into a relationship, it FELL aparant, and she got... HURT. 02:44 AA: What do you mean? 02:45 AA: You mean like she got her heart broken? 02:50 CT: Well her HEART ended UP hurt. 02:50 AA: That's a weird way to phrase that, Balish. 02:51 CT: Sami I'm not PROUD of it, but it happened. She NEEDED to be CULLED after she REVEALED what was going on. 02:51 AA: What? 03:03 CT: CULLED. You KNOW the word? 03:03 AA: Yeah....I wouldn't usually use it for a person though. 03:04 AA: Someone KILLED her? 03:04 CT: No. 03:04 CT: Not SOMEONE. 03:04 CT: I did. 03:04 AA: Oh, Balish...! 03:05 AA: Why did she NEED to be "culled?" 03:05 AA: And was this YOU you, or the OTHER you? 03:06 CT: She was being MANIPULATED by the Sept into CORRALING me in. She felt NOTHING but forced a flushed relationship until she couldn't TAKE it anymore. 03:06 CT: She REVEALED what was GOING ON and I ended her. 03:07 AA: Oh, Balish. I understand why you felt hurt and betrayed....but KILLING her over it? 03:07 CT: I DID what was NECESSARY. 03:08 AA: I just don't understand why that was necessary, I guess. 03:08 CT: She OFFERED an ultimatum, and I CHOOSE something she didn't WANT. 03:08 CT: It's WHY I've used SHITTY kitchen knives as WEAPONS. 03:09 AA: What kind of ultimatum? Was she threatening you? 03:09 CT: It's what I had on HAND. 03:09 AA: I'm sorry, I'm not trying to pry....I just want to understand. 03:09 CT: Sami, this is the Purpleblooded SPET of SUBBJUGGULATORS. 03:09 CT: Threatening is NORMAL. 03:09 AA: I don't want to believe you would kill someone just because they turned out to be crappy people. 03:10 CT: I don't WANT to delve TOO MUCH Sami. 03:10 CT: It's NOT SOMETHING I like to THINK about. 03:11 AA: I know. I'm sorry. I just want some sort of reassurance that I can trust you not to do that to one of us. I mean I trust the rest of the players I've met, but like... 03:11 CT: It was DIFFERENT with her. 03:11 AA: ...well I mean, I heard you and Null have been fighting, for example. You wouldn't cull her, would you? 03:11 CT: No. 03:11 CT: Nullar's TOO IMPORTANT. 03:12 AA: You mean important as a teammate? Or important as a friend? 03:12 CT: Sami... 03:13 AA: And don't give me this quadrant stuff, Balish! This isn't me trying to pale flirt or something, this is me needing to know that if Null stops being a helpful team member, you're going to turn on her just because she's been making some reckless decisions! 03:14 AA: Or if I can trust you to still be a loyal friend even if she can't help us win. 03:14 CT: She TRIED to let him take OVER. 03:14 CT: It was cull HER lose MYSELF. 03:14 AA: Oh, you mean this other girl? 03:14 CT: yes. 03:15 AA: Okay. Well....I guess I can sort of understand that then. 03:15 CT: it was THEIR plan, when she couldn't KEEP up the act. 03:15 AA: I mean I still don't like it....and I really don't like that you went through it. 03:15 AA: But it sounds like she was basically attacking you. 03:16 CT: make me UNCONCIOUS and he comes OUT, that's what she said. 03:16 AA: Wow. 03:16 AA: I can't understand why anyone would WANT him to come out. 03:17 AA: ...no offense. I mean I guess he's part of you somehow. 03:17 AA: ...but I like the Balish I'm talking to a lot better than I like that other Balish. 03:17 CT: I STABBED her SIDE and CHOKED the life from her EYES with her OWN specubus. 03:18 AA: I....didn't really need to know the details, Balish. 03:18 CT: I DID. 03:18 CT: Not HIM. 03:18 AA: Yeah, but....it was to keep him from coming out. 03:18 CT: It DIDN'T WORK. 03:18 AA: I mean it's still awful that you did that, but it sounds like it was kind of the lesser of two evils. 03:19 CT: I came TO with purple on the WALLS purple on the floor and that WORD. 03:19 CT: I 03:19 CT: I need a MOMENT. 03:19 AA: Yeah. Okay. I'm sure this is hard for you. 03:19 AA: Look, you don't have to relive it for me, either. I think I see where you're going here. 03:20 CT: THIS is why I didn't want to TALK about it. 03:20 AA: Yeah. I'm sorry. 03:20 CT: You're RIGHT not to TRUST me. 03:20 CT: But I THOUGHT you deserved a REASON, at least. 03:21 AA: I *do* trust you Balish. But now I know how serious this really is. 03:21 CT: Maenam is SOMEONE I care for, I can't LOSE her like that. 03:21 AA: And I understand why me encouraging Maenam left you feeling so raw. :( 03:21 CT: It's WHY I need to STOP feeling toward Nullar TOO. 03:21 AA: Stop? 03:21 AA: You mean stop being friends with her? 03:22 CT: Yes. 03:22 CT: If SOMETHING like that HAPPENS I need to do what NEEDS to be DONE. 03:22 AA: Oh, Balish. I don't think you have to stop being friends with her! 03:22 CT: Without RELYING on Him. 03:22 AA: No! Null is our friend, Balish! She might be startstruck by Jack right now, but on the inside she cares about us. 03:23 AA: You don't NEED to be able to do anything because it's NOT going to happen. 03:23 AA: She won't betray us to him. 03:23 CT: I can't SHAKE the feeling you are WRONG. 03:24 CT: She LOOKS like her TOO. 03:24 AA: Look. You've been through a lot. I understand why it's so hard for you to trust again, and why these memories make it even harder. 03:24 AA: And I trust you, too, Balish. 03:25 AA: But....I won't let you hurt her. You OR the Other You. 03:25 CT: I KNOW. 03:25 AA: I don't mean that as a threat. 03:25 CT: I know. 03:25 CT: You're BETTER than I am. 03:25 AA: I don't know about that. There's darkness inside me, too. 03:26 AA: And clearly Libby thinks you're the bee's knees. She's too smart to be ALL wrong about that. =P 03:26 CT: You're ATTEMPTING to lighten the MOOD. 03:26 AA: A little, yeah. 03:27 CT: I APPRECIATE the attempt. 03:27 AA: Anyway, I don't think this has to change anything between us. Not really, anyway. 03:27 CT: If you could find ONE troll to HELP, you would be the PERFECT moirail, you KNOW that? 03:28 AA: Haha. I don't know about that. 03:28 CT: WHATEVER. 03:28 AA: I know of one who could use the help....but we'll have to see what happens there. 03:28 CT: Oh? 03:29 AA: Sorry. I don't want to gossip about it. 03:29 AA: Especially because I may have already screwed things up. 03:29 AA: But we'll see where the future goes. 03:29 CT: Sami, you are HUMAN. 03:29 CT: You should seek AID with trollian concepts. 03:30 AA: Yeah, but....if I talk about this stuff, wouldn't it be betraying her trust? 03:30 AA: Or his trust. Or whatever. 03:30 CT: You do the SAME dumb thing Ryspor does. 03:31 AA: I don't think I've met Ryspor. He was Doir's moirail though, right? 03:31 CT: YES. 03:32 AA: I would hate to break anyone's heart....or diamond, or whatever the term would be for this, like he did Doir's... 03:32 CT: He is ALSO a paleslut. 03:32 AA: ...but I don't really know what happened there. 03:32 CT: PARDON the CRUDITY. 03:32 AA: It's not the first time a troll has called me some sort of slut. 03:32 AA: I'm growing numb to it. 03:32 CT: It's just WEIRD to be this NICE. 03:32 CT: Maenam was ALWAYS an oddball. 03:33 CT: I think Ryspor was DROPPED as a wriggler 03:33 AA: Yeah, I was about to say! Maenam's one of the sweetest people I know. 03:33 AA: She's sweeter than a lot of HUMANS I know. 03:33 CT: But you SEEM sain enough, yet STILL retain the mode of thinking. 03:34 CT: NOW. 03:34 CT: SEEK COUNSIL from me. 03:35 AA: Okay, well um....THIS ONE PARTICULAR troll admitted to having a palecrush for me. 03:35 CT: Okay, AND? 03:36 AA: And I totally reciprocate the feelings of wanting to fix her problems and share secrets with one another and everything. So I mean so far so good, right? 03:36 CT: CONTINUE. 03:37 AA: But she says she might need me to be MEAN to her from time to time to set her on the right path. I think maybe I could try to be all drill-sergeanty like the Colonel, but I don't think I could actually be MEAN mean. 03:37 AA: Just like....forceful, at best. 03:38 CT: Uh, WELL, it's not a USUAL moirail THING. 03:38 CT: If you are UNCOMFORTABLE with how SHE wishes to TAKE it, there is NO NEED to force yourself into the RELATIONSHIP. 03:38 CT: BESIDES, I know how HARD it would be to ACT exclusive. 03:39 CT: I know I'm going to need to have a LONG talk with Maenam about THIS, at least. 03:39 AA: Well, yeah, you would be right, but then she said that someone else had tried that thing on her and she got in a fist fight with him over it. 03:39 CT: NOT that I feel PALE for you, it's just CIRCUMSTANCIAL, and could be INTERPERATED as such a WAY. 03:39 CT: Fist FIGHT? 03:40 AA: Or something. I don't know. IT sounded like it was a full on brawl. 03:40 CT: Nullar is INTERESTED in being Pale with you? 03:40 AA: Crud. 03:40 CT: I was THERE. 03:40 CT: I ENCOURAGED Rilset, too. 03:40 CT: He NEEDED to stand UP for himself, in SOME way. 03:40 AA: Flip. I'm so bad at this! 03:41 CT: Yes, you ARE. 03:41 CT: It SOUNDS like. 03:41 AA: Look, can you just....forget that you know this? I really didn't mean to reveal things about her. 03:41 CT: NEVERMIND. 03:41 CT: I'm NOT going to BADGER Nullar about this. 03:42 AA: -_- I guess Scarlet already knows it all anyway, but still. It was really important to me not to talk about her behind her back. 03:42 AA: She's really sensitive about that sort of thing. :( 03:42 CT: I KNOW... 03:42 CT: Ugh. 03:43 AA: Look, the main thing is....I just want to see if we can become moirails, but I couldn't commit to it yet, and I think she thought I was saying I just wanted to stay platonic friends. 03:43 AA: Did I screw things up? 03:44 CT: I was PALE for Nullar once, WOW I made a bad choice PUSHING you to talk about it. 03:44 AA: Oh man. I'm sorry. 03:44 AA: This is really awkward. 03:44 CT: RATHER funny if you ASK me. 03:44 AA: Oh crickets. I am the worst at quadrants. 03:44 CT: I BELIEVE you messed UP, honestly. 03:44 AA: It's me. 03:45 AA: Yeah. I think you're right. 03:45 CT: Nullar has NO FRAME of reference to KNOW when you CAN commit, if you EVER could. 03:45 CT: If SOMEONE came to you with a PROBLEM, there is NO WAY you could turn them DOWN. 03:45 CT: And that HURTS, I know. 03:46 AA: I don't know. MAYBE I could. If I could figure out someone else to send them to... 03:46 AA: ...except Beau. 03:46 AA: That's the biggest problem, I think. 03:46 CT: Sami, you could NEVER turn someone DOWN. 03:46 CT: This CONVERSATION is proof. 03:46 AA: Huh? 03:46 CT: I OPENED up a little and what did you DO? 03:47 CT: REASSURED me like NO ONES buisness. 03:47 CT: You could have SIMPLY not POKED too deep, or SAID you were UNCOMFORTABLE. 03:47 CT: It's NOT what you want to HEAR, but I'm not going to LIE to a friend. 03:48 AA: Well but I mean....I had to know this stuff so I'd know I could trust you not to hurt Null... 03:48 AA: ...I guess I was kind of reassuring, though. 03:48 CT: . 03:48 CT: OKAY. 03:48 AA: Flip. I think you're right. 03:48 CT: You feel PALE for Nullar, so I think I can TELL you. 03:49 CT: When HE is in charge, he has an... URGE. 03:49 AA: Huh? 03:50 CT: He THINKS about the people I CARE about, and TARGETS them. 03:50 CT: THOUGHTS turn VIOLENT. 03:50 AA: Oh, Balish. That's awful! 03:50 CT: I have had VERY VERY... HARD thoughts about Libby, Maenam, Nullar, Beau, and Yourself. 03:51 AA: Really? Me and Beau too? 03:51 CT: DO not get too CARRIED away. 03:51 CT: SOME of you humans had to be OKAY. 03:51 CT: It's JUSt statistics. 03:52 CT: But YES, those are the STRONGEST. 03:58 AA: But that means you think of us as friends, right? 03:59 CT: Yes... 03:59 AA: Look....I don't want to gossip about her, and I don't want to meddle, but....I think Null really thinks you hate her right now. 04:00 CT: Ugh, SOMETIMES I can't help but think I DO. 04:00 CT: But I can't THINK of her like THAT. 04:00 CT: HE would get TOO excited, and Libby isn't READY yet. 04:03 AA: Wait....you mean THAT kind of hate?! 04:03 CT: Erm. 04:03 CT: Ugh. 04:03 CT: SHUT up Sami. 04:03 AA: Sorry. 04:04 AA: I'm not trying to pry or meddle, it's just....I think Libby would REALLY not be okay with that. So I'm definitely with you on keeping things from developing in that direction! 04:05 AA: I won't tell Null. But I meant I think she thinks you PLATONICALLY hate her. 04:05 CT: Oh. 04:05 CT: Why? 04:05 CT: That's NEW. 04:05 AA: Well honestly I think she thinks your whole team hates her. Probably over the Jack thing. 04:06 AA: It's just....if you ARE still her friend, it'd be good to do something to reassure her of that. Whatever the appropriate thing is to reassure someone you're still friends platonically is. 04:06 CT: I'd LIKE to, but she's... I don't WANT to get her HOPES up. 04:07 AA: Yeah. I understand it's delicate. 04:07 AA: I just hate that she thinks you guys hate her platonically. 04:07 CT: I'll TRY to talk to HER. 04:07 AA: Okay. Thanks. 04:08 AA: And I think you're right about the moirail thing, too. 04:08 CT: SEEMS like I'm doing YOUR job, though, paleflirt. 04:08 AA: *sigh* 04:08 CT: Or SHOULD I say greyflirt now? 04:08 AA: Huh? This is the second time you've said something about me being grey. 04:08 AA: Null said that was the couples counseling one, right? 04:08 CT: Uh. 04:08 CT: KIND of. 04:09 CT: It's a WAY to keep a relationship that WOULD be dangerous. NOT dangerous. 04:09 AA: Oh. 04:10 AA: Well that sounds pretty important to me. 04:10 CT: Yeah, the FIRST time I was REFERRING to My PERSONALITY and the OTHER, because it IS usually a black relationship that needs an Auspice. 04:11 AA: Oh....I didn't even think about that as a relationship. 04:11 AA: I guess I *was* doing that. 04:12 CT: Yes, you WERE. 04:12 CT: SETTING me up with a moirail is TOTALLY in that RANGE, for myself at LEAST. 04:12 AA: Look, clearly I handled that the wrong way. I see that now. 04:13 AA: But I don't feel bad about trying to keep that from being dangerous. 04:13 CT: Erm, SORRY, I was JOKING about it... 04:13 CT: TRYING your LIGHTHEARTED thing, since this is BUGGING you. 04:13 AA: Oh. Okay. 04:13 AA: Oh. Okay. I'm sorry I didn't realize that. 04:13 CT: It's FINE I suppose. 04:13 AA: Heh. Look at me being the one to bring down the room! 04:14 CT: SHOCKING. Usually YOU are the bright one. 04:14 CT: ANNOYINGLY bright. 04:14 AA: Heh. 04:15 AA: No one's ever accused me of being "bright" before. I'm going to assume trolls use that word differently from humans. ;) 04:15 CT: ALRIGHT, it has OTHER meanings, but I mean the CHEERFUL one. 04:15 CT: CLEARLY a definition. 04:16 AA: Okay Balish. Thanks for telling me all this. And I'm sorry I can't seem to keep it in my pants, pale-ishly speaking. 04:16 CT: LOOK at you, being CRUDE. 04:16 CT: It's FINE, since NEITHER of us feel pale for ONE ANOTHER. 04:17 AA: Okay. But I don't want to step on Maenam's toes either. 04:17 CT: WELL, as much as you CAN I imagine. 04:17 CT: I'll TALK to her about it, don't WORRY, it's MORE SO dealing with the CIRCUMSTANCE. 04:17 AA: Yeah. Okay. 04:18 CT: Well, be CAREFUL out there, greyslut. SOME horribly BLACK couple may SWOOP you right UP. 04:18 CT: I should GO, Libby has been TALKING with Ryspor for a LONG while. 04:18 AA: Hahaha. Okay. I'll be super careful. 04:18 AA: Bye Balish. 04:19 CT: Goodbye, STAY well. -- arcaneArtisan AA gave up trolling conciseTactician CT at 04:19 --